How to Attract Women on Dating Apps
How to Attract Women on Dating Apps — Unlock the 14 Traits Women Crave
By Joshua Pompey
If you’re not sure how to attract women on dating apps or have been feeling like dating apps are a waste of time, you’ve come to the right place. For almost 2 decades I’ve been helping men to attract women online with ease.
How? It’s not magic or some secret formula I’ve discovered. Nor do you need to pay some exorbitant fees to “gain access to my secrets.” My teachings are based in the same science and psychology that anyone with access to the internet or a library can discover on their own.
When it comes to learning how to attract women on dating apps, you simply need to know what the building blocks of attraction are. Over years I’ve discovered that there are many ways you can attract women based on qualities and personality traits that have absolutely nothing to do with your looks.
All you have to do is learn these online triggers, that apply them to every action you take on dating apps, from the photos you post, to the profiles you write, to the messages you craft. Do this properly, and you will be able to attract women on dating apps with complete ease. So let’s take a look at what these attraction triggers are.
1. Confidence
Confidence is one of the most magnetic male traits when it comes to attracting women on dating apps.
When you don’t show confidence, you’re indirectly signaling that a woman can do better than you. Confident men signal strength, self-belief, and emotional stability — all things women deeply value.
A confident man can thrive in social settings, handle challenges, and put people at ease. And most importantly, he knows he’s worth pursuing.
2. Ambition and Drive
Ambition is more than just career talk — it’s one of the strongest evolutionary green flags for women.
Why? It signals security and the potential to provide — both now and down the road. Ambition also shows that you’re not lazy, that you have goals, and that you’re someone who applies effort in all areas of life — including relationships.
It tells her you’re the kind of man who goes after what he wants.
3. Assertiveness
Assertiveness shows that you’re confident in your opinions and capable of making decisions — without being controlling.
While women absolutely want someone who’s kind and respectful, they also want someone with backbone. A man who stands up for himself and isn’t just going to “yes” her to death? That’s attractive.
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4. Leadership
Leadership is about more than being in charge — it’s about showing that you can guide, support, and step up when needed.
It signals decisiveness, emotional maturity, and the ability to care for not just yourself, but potentially a partner or family as well. And yes — leadership often aligns with classic alpha traits women are wired to respond to.
5. Social Intelligence
If you’re wearing mismatched clothes in your photos or writing awkward, try-hard captions, you may be signaling low social intelligence.
Social intelligence is about understanding people, navigating situations smoothly, and blending in without needing a woman to hold your hand.
It tells her she can bring you around her closest people — friends, family, co-workers — without a second thought.
6. Humor
Humor is consistently ranked as one of the most attractive traits in a man — and it’s not just about cracking jokes.
Being funny requires wit, timing, and brainpower. It also signals social confidence and emotional awareness. Humor tells her you’ll fit in with her tribe, that you’ll make her laugh, and that even if sparks don’t fly, the date won’t be a total drag.
It’s a low-risk, high-reward proposition — and women love that.
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7. Intelligence
Women are naturally drawn to intelligent men. Intelligence shows that you can problem-solve, adapt, and engage on a deeper level.
It’s also strongly correlated with long-term success — financially, emotionally, and socially. And on a simpler level, intelligence means you’re just… interesting.
8. Kindness
Kindness might not be flashy, but it’s one of the most powerful long-term attractors.
Historically, kindness helped form strong social bonds — and today, it still signals that you’re cooperative, loyal, and supportive. Kindness shows that behind all the confidence and strength, you’re someone who actually cares.
That’s rare — and very attractive.
9. Social Value
Social value means you’re respected by the people around you — in your career, among your friends, and within your community.
Women are drawn to men who are valued by others because it implies you’re trustworthy, useful, and worth knowing. Whether it’s leadership at work, being the go-to guy in your friend group, or supporting a cause — show that you matter.
10. Commonalities
We’re tribal by nature. Even today, we gravitate toward people who feel like “one of us.” If women aren’t responding on dating apps you may not be tapping into enough commonalities.
Having common interests creates a strong sense of familiarity and comfort — two things that make a woman feel safe. Whether it’s music, travel, sports, or nerdy obsessions, highlighting shared interests helps bridge the connection fast.
11. Creating Demand
If you come across as someone who’s sought after by others, you instantly seem more valuable.
It’s a basic principle of social proof — if others want you, she’ll wonder why. And maybe she’ll want to find out for herself.
Dating photos with friends, subtle confidence, and a lifestyle that looks full (not desperate) all help create demand — without saying a word.
12. Appearing Worldly
Travel and cultural curiosity aren’t just hobbies — they’re deep signals of openness, intelligence, and adaptability.
Being well-traveled tells a woman that you’re open-minded, flexible, and not afraid to get out of your comfort zone. It also makes you more interesting, conversational, and ready for shared adventures.
13. Being Adventurous
Adventure signals that you’re bold, spontaneous, and not afraid to embrace the unknown.
Whether it’s food, sports, travel, or random bucket list items, adventurous men create exciting lives — and women want to be a part of that. It also signals emotional resilience and a capacity for growth.
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14. Being a Protector
In today’s world, being a protector doesn’t mean fighting off enemies — it means being a man who creates emotional and physical safety.
You don’t need muscles or bravado. A solid career, a picture holding your niece, or a profile that shows family loyalty or pet ownership can all communicate the same thing: “I’m steady. I’m grounded. I’ll make you feel safe.”
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These 14 traits can spark instant attraction — but only if you know how to infuse them properly into all aspects of your dating profile. And that’s where we come in.
Here at JoshuaPompey.com, our expert team has helped thousands of men craft irresistible profiles that showcase their best traits at a success rate of over 99% for close to two decades.
If you’re ready to finally stand out and attract the kind of women you want, let our profile writing experts help you make it happen — with ease. Click here to learn more