The Secret to Building Attraction On Dating Apps

The Secret to Building Attraction On Dating Apps (That Has Nothing to Do With Looks)

By Joshua Pompey

building attraction with women on dating apps

Now that you understand the importance of the 3 legged stool—your photos, your profile, your messages, it’s time to bring it all to life with the one ingredient that separates forgettable profiles from irresistible ones: the ability to build attraction.

Here’s the truth most men never understand:

Attraction isn’t a choice.

When a woman sees your profile, she doesn’t sit there analyzing whether she should be attracted to you. It happens instantly, automatically, and subconsciously. Just like how you can’t help but notice a stunning woman when she walks into a room, she can’t help feeling drawn to a man who triggers the right signals.

The good news? You can easily learn to send those signals.

That’s where my system—A.I.M.E.—comes in.


A.I.M.E. for Success

A.I.M.E. for online dating success

To truly stand out in the chaos of dating apps, you need to master four simple but powerful stages:

A – Attract

The first moment a woman sees your profile, she should feel something. Attracting women on dating apps happens in seconds, and your goal is to create that spark through confident photos, intriguing prompts, and messages that show personality—not desperation.

I – Intensify

Attraction alone isn’t enough. Once you spark her interest, you need to fan the flame. Each message, each interaction should build curiosity, fun, and emotional connection.

M – Maintain


Plenty of men can start strong but fade fast. The key is to maintain that attraction up until the first date—keeping your tone consistent, playful, and authentic so she doesn’t lose interest or ghost.

E – Execute


Finally, when you meet in person, everything resets. You start the A.I.M.E. cycle all over again—but this time face-to-face, where your energy, confidence, and communication matter most.


The Big Misconception About Looks

Here’s what I want you to remember: women aren’t wired like men.

While men respond mostly to physical appearance, women are drawn to internal qualities—confidence, ambition, and social awareness.

That’s why average-looking men with charisma and emotional intelligence often attract women far above their “league.”

It’s not luck. It’s science.

When your profile and messages reflect those internal traits, women feel an instant pull that they can’t explain—because it’s not logical, it’s biological.


Your Challenge for This Week:

Look at your profile and ask yourself:

  • Does this spark instant attraction?
  • Do my photos and prompts convey confidence and personality?
  • Or do they look like everyone else’s?

Pick one area to improve this week. Next time, we’ll dive into how to build your “Attraction Score”—a measurable way to boost your online appeal, no matter where you’re starting from.


Want Some Professional Help That Will Help You To Avoid Feeling Invisible on Dating Apps?

Our team of experts specializes in crafting profiles that highlight your unique strengths and attract the highest quality matches. Let us help you select the perfect photos and create a profile that gets results — because your success on dating apps starts with the right first impression.

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