7 Ways to Write Online Dating First Emails That Attract The Successful & Well-Rounded Professional

7 Ways To Write First Emails That Attract The Successful & Well-Rounded Professional


By Joshua Pompey


In this article you will earn how to write online dating first emails that will attract even the most successful and well-rounded professionals.



He’s interesting.  He’s well-rounded.  And dammit if he isn’t handsome.  That Joshua Pompey sure is dreamy huh?  Oh… Umm… You were thinking of the guy you saw online this morning… This is so embarrassing.


Well, nonetheless, suppose you saw this all around great guy online.  In order to get his attention, you will need to learn how to write first emails that break through the noise and ignite instant interest.  Let’s take a look at a few emailing tips that will help you make this happen.


The 2 minute rule


No, I’m not referring to the amount of time it usually takes for me to blow up my kitchen when I attempt to cook a pop tart.  I’m referring to the time it takes for a man to read and respond to your first email.


As a rule of thumb, the more successful and well-rounded a man is, the less time he probably has to log onto a dating site and answer emails.  So make sure your opening emails take no longer than 30 seconds to read, and less than 90 seconds to respond to.  The perfect online dating first email is highly engaging and unique, but accomplishes these goals in a very efficient manner.


Avoid questions that require too much thinking 


You want your questions to be interesting, but you don’t want them to frustrate your audience.  For example, asking a man what the most exciting thing he’s ever done might sound a fun question in theory, but in reality, it requires him to scan his entire life for an answer, and also puts a lot of pressure on him to come up with an interesting response.


An example of a better question might be, “You seem to have some really exciting profile pictures.  Here’s a fun question.  If you could check one exciting thing off your bucket list this coming year, what would it be and why?  If you say sky-diving, I may just have to join you… :)”


Focus on a commonality in your first email


A well rounded man is going to have a lot of passions and interests.  Try to find ways to connect with them in your opening message.  The more you establish right off the bat that you are a person he could share a future bond with, the more interest you will naturally ignite.


Flirt a little bit


If you were to meet a guy you liked in person, odds are you would flirt with him a little bit.  You might smile, tease him, and playfully touch his arm.


Well in the online world, all we have is our words to communicate.  Don’t be afraid to have a little fun with a man and flirt the same way you would in person.  Emoticons and exclamation points are the easiest way to establish a playful and flirtatious tone.


“Awww.  Didn’t anybody ever tell you that the Met’s are never going to win a World Series?  I feel so bad… If you want, you are always welcome to join the winners over here on the Yankees side…  Lol.  Sorry, I couldn’t resist.  Life long Yankee fan here!  So do you hate Yankee fans as much as most Met fans?  We could talk but this might be doomed to fail… ; )”


Always choose words that reveal confidence


The other day a coaching client of mine received an email that ended with the following statements, “This is new for me as I’m figuring the whole online thing out, so what the hell.  I’m cool with the texting, but I’ll wait to see if you even want to talk first. Hope to hear from you I guess?”  This example shows a lack of confidence on every level.


Statements such as “if you even want to talk” or “hope to hear from you,” give up all power and create the image of someone who is just sitting around, hoping that she will receive a response.  This is a huge turn off to a man.


A better way to end an opening email would be, “Well I have to run.  I’m off to a yoga class than heading out to meet up with some friends.  Enjoy your night and I’ll talk to you soon!”


This language not only shows confidence that the writer will receive a response, but it also communicates an active social life and the desire to take care of her body, which are also attractive qualities.


Do not try to win a man over with flattery


Think about the last time a man approached you online by telling you how beautiful you were, or how amazing you seem.  You may have felt good for the moment, but it didn’t make you attracted to that person.  In fact, it probably made you think he was trying too hard or was desperate.


Don’t create the same image for yourself.  On some level, all men love the thrill of a chase.  Don’t make them chase too hard, but at the same time, don’t lay all your cards on the table and shower them with flattery the second you send your first email.


Avoid small talk and be interesting


If you want a guy to be interested, you have to actually be interesting in your opening email.  Avoid asking the same questions that they have already been asked countless times. Instead, focus on questions that are unique, playful, and fun.


Need a little help with your emailing?


My world famous profile writing service comes with the Online Rules of Love, which is filled with all of my best rules for landing a quality man with your emails.  To learn more about how this book and my fully guaranteed profile writing service can ensure that you attract the highest quality men online, click here now.


Prefer a free profile evaluation?  Sign up absolutely free on this page and one of my profile writing experts would be glad to give you some pointers.  Spots are limited so don’t wait!  And if you’d like to download a free e-book on how to create the perfect visual story just click here.

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